It’s always easy to differentiate between love and lust when it comes to others. But when it comes to ourselves, practically speaking, we hardly get a clear vision to see and differentiate love and lust.
We, humans, are always blind to see anything wrong when it comes to something that we like. The saying, love is blind fits for lust too. A person who is high on lust will never be able to see the reality behind their lust.
Love carries an emotional attachment between two people. Love is a deep feeling of affection that one feels for the other person. Once in love, you will be caring for that person you love.
On the other hand, lust begins with a physical attraction only, basically driven by a strong feeling of sexual fantasy and desire, which is caused by the rush of hormones.
Some people consider lust to be the first stage of love; well I completely disagree with that! Lust can never grow and morph in love. It will always remain as lust and lust has a very short age.
So before one knows what’s going on, they are already away from it and get involved with some other person.
If you are also going through the same phase where you are sure if it’s love or lust, here are some major points that differentiate lust from love.
Also, Read Why Love Is Not Enough For A Happy Relationship
You constantly Think About Them
When it’s lust one can constantly think about the other person. However, the thoughts mostly will be about the physical aspect and features and these thoughts won’t be related to any other thing about the other person.
In love also our mind constantly keeps on thinking about them the difference will be the thoughts and the ways how we remember them. While in love, we think about their mind, their nature, and other things related to them.
Thoughts of having a physical intimacy might be there, but that doesn’t remain as the only point to think about.
They Are Not Perfect And You Know That
We all know that no one is perfect. But, when we are driven by lust we easily lose sight of that. Sexual desires; lust present a perfect image of the person, we have a lust for. We don’t see anything bad about them or we don’t see who they really are.
This is natural that we present our best version of ourselves when we are about to start a relationship or impress someone. It will take time to know what kind of person they truly are. After some time they start behaving normal (no more attempts to impress you) and now you see their true character and colors, you start knowing them better.
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Now, in case it was lust, it will stop then and there because the perfect image of them has been broken with the real picture of that person. But if it’s love, your feelings for the person won’t change. Because, in love you accept them with all their flaws and exactly the way, they are.
You Just Want To Talk To Them Whole Night
It’s easy to stay up all night enjoying each other’s company, when in lust. But it will never be a conversation that will keep you awake. It will be something else but not a conversation.
But when it is love, you will be interested in their mind and not the body only. Topics for conversation will keep on poring naturally. You won’t have to put any effort to talk, because you love them and want to be with them.
Love creates bonding between two people’s mind and hearts, Lust creates a bond with the body only.
You Want To Wake Up With Them And Spend More Time Together
When it is lust, you will prefer to leave once your physical desire/need is completed. But when it is love, you would like to stay with them for more time. You would like to wake up with them and cuddle and be together and enjoy their company. While sex is done and over, you still prefer to be with them. This is love!
You Like to Meet Their Family Members
When you have a lust for someone, only they will be important for you and not anyone else from their family or their friends. You won’t have any interest in meeting their friends or relatives.
But in love, you would always like to know more about them, their family members, their friends and all. You feel that way because you want to be a part of their family and friend circle. You take the opportunity of meeting these people to develop a relationship with them.
You don’t avoid meeting people who are important to them but in lust, they are not important to you.
Only Attraction Is Not Love
No, love, at first sight, is a myth. It doesn’t exist. One might feel attraction towards someone at first sight, but that is not love. Doesn’t matter how strong that attraction is.
You might feel like holding them and kiss only, but that doesn’t mean that you are in love with them. It takes time to love someone. You start feeling an emotional attachment; it doesn’t remain to the physical layers of the person only. You go beyond their physical appearance
You need time to spend together to love someone, this can happen even when you two are not together in person. A regular conversation over the phone also helps you to know more about them and feel that emotional attachment for them. But when you don’t need time to know someone, and all you want is to be with them, is nothing but Lust.
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Lust goes for a quick outcome/result; love waits for the bond to develop first. Lust loses its breaths soon because it sprints; love walks slowly and is never short of breaths. Lust never makes any place in our hearts, while love does.
This might not be an easy task for us to accept that it’s only lust and not love, but it’s wise to differentiate to avoid self-humiliation and some unwanted moments in life.